13

kaira astor

Sore.

Aching.

Spent.

I groan, rolling over on my bed and press my face into the pillow. Every muscle in my body is straining. Zyran didn't stop and when I completely fell down on the mat, he yanked me upright and shoved gloves over my hands, gesturing toward the swinging punch bag. Though, by the end of it, I wanted to spin around and punch him. Which I knew would only end up in him fighting me back and insulting me further. Instead, I focused that anger on the bag, picturing his stupid face and stupid eyes, and stupid hollow smirks and stupid hair.

Until I collapsed.

The creak of the door swinging open pauses my frantic thoughts. I'll snap his ne-- "You look f*****g terrible, Kai." Amara's stony voice rings in my ear, but I don't shift, every part of my being on fire. "Training with Zyran?" She breathes out his name, the edge seductive and a hint of something else. My shoulders stiffen, and I soon regret it when the pain shoots through me. "Yes," My answer is muffled by the pillow. She inhales a sharp breath and then exhales slowly. "Well, f**k," Shuffling comes from my drawers and I know she's in search of my red lipstick. "If he's that hard on you with training that you can't even move, I'm excited to see what he does to be in bed." She purrs.

I roll over, my muscles protesting and a groan rips from my throat as I sit up straight. "Seriously?" I hiss out, my eyes narrowing as I stare at her, standing in front of my mirror. She's dressed in a pretty white sundress that falls down to her thigh, the color meshing with her light, smooth skin. She always looks flawless, and me? I always look like I just rolled out of bed. "What?" Her eyebrows cave in as she parts her lips, smearing her plump lips with red. The color is so stark, drawing attention to her mouth. "It's not like it's going to affect you in any way." Twisting around, she eyes me with those snake hues. I bite down on my tongue, locking all my muscles to keep from squirming under her gaze.

Of course, it's going to affect me. He's my guard and she's my best friend. I halt. My guard? Not dwelling on the thought, I clear my throat. "No, but if things go sideways, it will affect me." I grit out through clenched teeth, and she rolls her green eyes. "It won't, it's just some fun." She rolls her bottom lip into her mouth and her teeth dig into the flesh. Fun? My eyebrows draw together, but I don't say anything. Running her fingers through her strands, she ruffles out her hair. "When was the last time you had fun?" The question catches me off guard, my eyelashes fluttering.

"Don't pretend that you don't. I know about Darian, remember?" Which I now regret ever telling her about. I shuffle backward on the bed, biting down on the wince, threatening to escape my throat. "We've never had..." I bite into the side of my cheek as heat rushes to my cheeks. I shake my head lightly. This is my best friend. She won't judge me. I inhale a deep breath. "That kind of fun." My gaze drops to my wrists, there are still faint bruises brushing over my wrists from when he tied me to the bed. My breath hitches in my throat at the memory. Amara's gaze is heavy and nearly suffocating as she stares at me. My cheeks burn brighter. "You're joking, right?" Filled with shock, she almost squeaks. I gnaw on the bruised skin of my bottom lip and softly shake my head.

She's silent for a moment, as if assessing me, her eyes roving over my body for signs of lies. "Y'all never did it? You've been sneaking off for years now." Amara moves closer, abandoning her reflection in the mirror, completely enthralled by my virginity, apparently. I pull the cuffs of my shirt over my hands and clasp them together, pushing it between my legs. My eyes flutter up to meet hers and I shrug sheepishly. "Yeah, we've messed around before," I never felt like it was right to sleep with him. He'd just sneak in, we'd make out, and then he'd leave. I was comfortable with him, just not comfortable doing that.

"But we never slept together." I confess, shame flashing over my face. I don't know why, but the way she looks at me makes me feel as if being a virgin is horrid news. "You're twenty-one years old." She states, her eyes roaming over me. "You're attractive, and I'm guessing kind of wild." My eyes bulge at her statement, my palms turning sweaty. "So, why haven't you done it with Darian yet? He's very attractive too." Amara tilts her head, mischief dancing in her eyes. I press my lips into a thin line and glance off to the side.

Call it cliché, but I want my first time to feel right, and it never has with Darian. Besides, I've never felt the need to take it that far. It's fun with Darian, but... Zyran makes me feel more with just a glance than what Darian has ever made me feel with his mouth and fingers. I blink, taken aback by my thought. Zyran makes me feel those things because I hate him-- not just dislike, but hate. I turn to face Amara, still waiting for me to answer. "I don't know. I just don't want to, Amara." I'm growing agitated. Amara huffs, rolling her green eyes as she spins. "Sorry for wanting to make sure your husband doesn't grow bored in the bedroom." She snaps, her voice low and demeaning.

My lips part and my eyes widen, insults hanging on the tip of my tongue. A sharp knock disrupts the tension in the room and I gulp. Zyran? No, he wouldn't have knocked. Still, caution weaves in my voice as I call out, "Come in." The door knob twists and the door creaks open. I hold my breath. Dax steps in, his eyes flitting to mine before slowly dragging to Amara's. "Your father requested your presence in his office." Formal and cold, and I realize it's because of Amara. He doesn't like her, I remember. I blow out the breath I've been holding, my body deflating. With strained movements, I slide off the bed, gritting my teeth. I was hoping to shower first, but I need out of this room, especially after what Amara said.

Dax turns and steps out and I follow behind. "Kair--" I slam the door closed behind me before she can utter out anything else.

----

I step into my Father's cold office, pressing the door closed. "You wanted to see me?" I murmur, my mood sour. A heavy sigh escapes him as he leans back in his chair, rolling a black pen between his fingers. "Yes, please have a seat. We have a few things to discuss." Flicking his hand toward the chair opposite him, I watch him warily, trying to read his face. As cold as ever. This is serious.

He leans forward when I step closer to his desk, planting his elbows on the edge of the wood, his eyebrows pulling together. “Two things we need to speak about,” He raises his hand, lifting two fingers for emphasis. Sinking down into the plush seat, keeping my eyes firmly on him, I clasp my hands together in my lap. “What is it? Stop stalling and just spit it out, dad.” My voice quivers as I speak. If it involves another thing about Zyran, I might hurt someone.

He raises a brow, his eyes roving over my face. “It’s about you going down into the basement.” The words aren’t harsh, not even in the slightest, but there’s something dark lurking in his eyes— disappointment? I roll my bottom lip into my mouth and gnaw at the skin. “I had to speak to him.” I avert my eyes, dropping to my lap. Goosebumps prick at my skin, shame lingering over my flesh. Dad taps his pen against the hard wood, his nose flaring as he sighs. “That is why, I’m considering making Zyran your personal guard from now on.” My heat stops.